Yesterday, I saw a couple who were back for a third baby. Four years ago, they had done their first cycle of IVF and wound up with twins. After delivering a boy and a girl and enduring sleepless nights feeding them and changing diapers, they apparently did not feel they had suffered enough, so they were now back for a third baby. As our conversation wound down to the financials and the $3K they would have to invest to do a frozen embryo transfer for their third baby, the husband could not help but proudly ask me if I wanted to hear about the "wisest investment decision" he had made. His wife broke into a huge smile, as if there were some huge private joke. I was surprised to hear an off-the-wall comment about investing come out of the blue like that, but part of me was interested in hearing what he meant, because with the recent events in the stock market, it would seem that wise investments are few and far between.
He went on and told me about a coworker of his. Apparently, the two of them shared many parallels. They shared the same first name and were the same age. They worked in the same department of the same company and originally bonded when they struck up a conversation about a the dangers of nuclear attack. One of them was Israeli and greatly concerned about an Iranian nuclear attack some day. The other was South Korean and worried about a launch some day from North Korea. This was what first drew them together as friends. One was an avid Dodger’s fan, while one loved the Angels. They were both married for about 3 years and still childless. Their wives were just four years apart in age. One day, about three years ago, when the company awarded their employees a large bonus, they discussed where to invest it. One of them proudly put it into the stock market and started growing it. The other one decided to take the money and come do an IVF cycle. As a result, one wound up building quite a sizable investment portfolio, getting richer as the stock values increased, while the other friend wound up with twins, a boy and a girl. While one of them continued to grow his money, the other one expended money, first by spending $14K on infertility treatment, and later, by spending close to $1000 per month on various baby expenses for the twins.
Fast forward to a month ago, four years later. The friend who had chosen the investment route now found that he and his wife were four years older, but had a lot of money on which to spend on infertility treatment. They were ready to do treatment, so they could boast that they had both, a secure nest egg and a family. Then all of a sudden, the bottom of the market dropped out and their investment value plummeted. So now, while they still have enough to pursue fertility treatment, they are newly hesitant about dipping into their relatively meager savings (as compared to before the market crash). So now, one of the friends has two lovely children and some frozen embryos for the future, while the other one has about $20K in the bank, which they will have to decide if it is to be spent on infertility treatment.
Life is really about choices and options. Having children is an investment, just liking putting money in the stock market. I wouldn’t advocate going bankrupt pouring all your money into your children, but I would not recommend the opposite extreme either.
